“What does it mean to love someone? It means to be happy for someone’s happiness, to do everything that needs to be done to make someone happier, and to be happy from it.”
In fact, the true sense of happiness, satisfaction and achievement only comes from the process of loving and giving. “Paying” for the person you love in exchange for his happiness and wellbeing, the feeling you bring to yourself at that moment is also worth it. The premise is that there is no purpose or selfishness, and you just love someone purely because of his happiness.
Feeling happy, sad because of his sadness. No matter what the final result is, even if there is no result, at least in the process of being happy, giving, and being happy, that’s enough. Love does not necessarily have results, but must have meaning.
The influence of some people on you will be really long and big, beyond your own imagination. Accepting all kinds of regrets in life is not necessarily a bad thing. The process of loving someone is sweet, if you feel bitter, there must be desire behind it. When love is mixed with desire, it will be painful if it is not obtained, and boring if it is obtained, and it will always wander between the two. To put it more simply, you have a particularly strong desire, and your subjective consciousness thinks that you must achieve it. When the result cannot go with the desire, sorrow will come, and pain will come. But that is definitely not the feeling of loving someone very purely.
Many people have an attitude towards love, that love is to be together regardless, and to indulge all their behaviors and desires in the name of love. Love does not make people sad, what makes people sad is that they do not satisfy their own desires through love. All your pain is not caused by love, but by the desire and selfishness mixed with love, so you must think clearly about the source of your pain.
To be honest, the world is very big, and it is a special fate for whoever can meet someone. It is the so-called look back five hundred times in the past life, in exchange for the passing of this life. It is already a great fate to know each other, and if you can fall in love again, you should grasp it even more. Therefore, if you meet love, I also hope that you can love bravely, boldly, and love with all your strength, regardless of the final result, it is enough to be worthy of the process. Even if that person doesn’t like you, at least you have fought and worked hard. It’s better to regret for a while than regret for a lifetime.
However, the order of appearances in life is so important. The saddest thing is falling in love with someone who knows that you can’t be together. If you encounter such a relationship, I advise you to let go as soon as possible. Letting go doesn’t necessarily mean not loving, it’s relief, and it’s changed into a form of love, a silent blessing. The saddest thing is when you meet someone special, but you realize that you can never be together, sooner or later, you have to give up, regardless of whether you want to love to the end, in the end, it will be a disaster for both people, which goes against the original intention of love.
Love is a blessing, a joy, not wild, nor presumptuous. So don’t entangle or hurt. Regret is the normal state of life, but it’s not a regret, it’s just to change your form of love, you need to restrain your own desires. Everything is the best arrangement, keep your head clear, don’t let love become deformed, your love should be able to bring you motivation, and it should also make the other person feel relaxed, love that is kidnapping, is a poison. If I love you, you must love me too. If I love you, I must be with you. This standard is only made by people’s selfishness.
What does it feel like to give up someone you love but can’t be with? Maybe the answer everyone thinks is unwillingness, pain, anger, reluctance, etc. In fact, in the face of this situation, you can truly feel the feeling after giving up, and you will not feel sad. I am talking about a message I received in the background.
A 26-year-old girl, my listener, fell in love with a person who knew that there was no result and that she could not be together. During that time, her living condition was that she wanted to lock herself in the room, couldn’t help crying, couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep at night, and all work was time-consuming. All she was thinking about was that man, and without him, she felt as if she couldn’t live anymore. Love was supposed to make people happy, but for her it brought only endless sadness. It was because she cared so much about the outcome that she thought about giving up countless times, but she felt that if she really gave up, she would hurt herself.
Just going around like this, after half a year of love-hate entanglement during our sessions, she figured it out and decided to let it go. That is, at that moment, she seemed to come out of the haze. After adjusting her mentality, she felt like she had never felt before. The ease, yes, she felt ease after making the decision to give up. She no longer has to be entangled by love or tortured by love. When she can treat that love with a correct attitude, she will find her optimistic and positive self again. She still loves very much, but this love was hidden in her heart and turned into a blessing. She hopes that the person she loves can live happily and peacefully, and she also wants to make herself happy and happy for the person she loves. Not being together, it really doesn’t matter anymore, turning obsession into belief.
Only after she let go did she realized that it was not love at all that tortured her, but her inner obsession. The strong possessiveness had overwhelmed her mind, causing her to be in chaos, and brought to almost loosing the sense of life.
The deeper the obsession, the more paranoid people are, and they will try their best to get to the point. No matter how thick the wall in front of them is, but even if their hit their head and bleed blood, they better never forget to comfort themselves in their heart, just in case.
In other words, although you know very well that there will be no results between you two, but you are not willing to accept this fact, admit this fact, you must comfort yourself in your heart, deceive yourself if it is possible! This is the struggle between reason and sensibility, but in this struggle, two people are implicated.
We can’t act on our feelings. We can do whatever we want when we have feelings. It’s strange that life is not messy. On the other hand, some feelings will last forever just because they let go in time. I like Wilde’s saying very much: “There are only two tragedies in life, one is not getting what you want, and the other is getting it.” As a result, it is just another new beginning, and the result is endless pursuit.
If you have experienced or still experience something similar in your life, believe me, this is not a dead end, it’s just an opportunity for the two of us to sit down and talk to you – how long it will take you to finally understand that you were born to love, be loved, give and sustain life. And we should be grateful for his every step for example and the path to true love.