Last week in a sharing sharing coaching talk with flight attendant I was asked, how can I soften my heart? There are many answers for everyone, such as patience, love, tolerance, dedication, altruism, generosity, letting go, regardless of gains and losses, making yourself happy, and caring for others. These answers are all good. But how can the heart be truly soft?
Open your heart. Only an open heart can be brilliant, harmonious and at ease. If your heart is obstructed and cannot be opened, no one can help you. This shows that the softness of the heart lies in yourself. When others see sincerity, acceptance, and joy in your eyes, your eyes are soft. When your body language is comfortable, calm and free, your heart is soft.
In “The Old Path and White Clouds”, it is written about one man walking on the road. His expression was kind, free, and detached. All those who were fortunate enough to witness his demeanor were shocked and moved by it. This is the power of softness. Sometimes words cannot replace the power of expressions and demeanor; the true touch comes from silence, your thousand words are far less than your eyes.
The man was able to do it precisely because his mind was already quiet and soft, without hatred, hostility, and rejection. There was only detached peace in his look and behavior. Meditation is through continuous self-reflection and transformation, so that the body, mind, and soul reach a soft state, and you will find that everything will become better.
Communication with customers, collaboration with the team, getting along with your boss, and contact with family and friends, you can naturally do your best. When you can cultivate your mind like water and air without any obstacles, all the problems you encounter can be easily solved. Softness is a kind of lightness, softness is a kind of letting go, softness is a love, and softness is acceptance and tolerance between people. It is a positive force, and it can help your life become better.
Starting from now, do a thorough cleaning from the inside out, and change all the narrow thinking and habits before. I don’t know if you have ever thought that if a good friend splits up with you, chances always rub shoulders with you. What is the reason? That’s because the selfishness is doing worship, and these dark forces always dominate everything about us.
The time to test us has arrived, how should we face it? How to accept and resolve it? After solving it, how do you let it go? We must learn to put it down wherever we pick it up. Unable to let it go will only make your burden heavier and heavier. In the end, if you can’t move your back, if you can’t walk, you will fall. But what to pick up and what to put down?
Pick up what you really want to do and put aside the mental obstacles that shouldn’t exist, so as to gain physical and mental comfort and face every day with joy. Learning is that simple. Everything has to be felt by yourself. Wisdom is not a learned knowledge. There is no way for you to experience wisdom by teaching it.
A long time ago, there was a born blind man who never knew what color was. If you tell him that white is like a white cloth, he will touch those soft cloths; if you tell him that white is like a white dove, he will touch those birds with body temperature; but you again tell him that white should be like snow, and he believes that white is cold. You can’t understand how he keeps misinterpreting your meaning. He doesn’t have such a concept, and it won’t help you to explain it.
Zen is like the “white” in this story. There is no way to explain it clearly with words, no way to explain it with metaphors. It is up to you to understand and understand it. Let your mind calm down and feel it with your own heart. This is Zen. The realm of Zen is actually very close to us.
Go home from get off work, calm your mind, and drive away the fatigue of the day. The tranquility, stretching and relaxation at this moment will give you happiness and peace. This is Zen. Meditation is to improve our self-awareness. What do you think? It’s not about your work, but about the essence of life.
A conscious person has nothing to fear in life, he or she can solve everything they encounter, and they can face everything calmly and calmly. Because when you stand in the perspective of awareness, you already have sufficient wisdom. And when we have this infinite wisdom, you will find that there is no problem in life that can hinder you. No matter who you are and what is your job, as long as you live in this world even one day, you will encounter such things. They will disturb your life and affect your mood.
For example, you may think the lunch at noon today is not good, someone treated me badly today, and I have to get up before I sleep enough. So many unsatisfactory things have been happening around you. Your potential anxiety has never disappeared, because today’s health does not mean that tomorrow’s disease will not come; today’s harmonious interpersonal relationship cannot guarantee tomorrow’s loyalty; today’s smooth work may be disrupted tomorrow.
So many questions are always entwining you, how do you deal with it? Solve problems with wisdom, peace, and acceptance. Do you really understand your body? Do you really understand the world? How do the mental activities that you produce all the time appear? You may never know these. But you can let others feel softness of your loving heart. Write a couple of soft lines to your connection, say a soft word to your colleague, soften your emotional condition in a desperate situation with relationship. People will feel it, they will pick it up and you will put it down..